Thursday, October 27, 2011

What makes a good kiss?

So I was thinking about kissing today, as I do often.  Kissing is one of my all-time favorite things to do when I am with a partner.  I could kiss for hours.  You know, the kind of make out session you had when you first discovered the wonders of kissing?  A friend suggested that I might have been stunted or just stayed in that age because that is when my life seemed to stop moving forward since I got into a long term relationship right out of Jr. High School.  (Eventually married and were together for nearly 20 years before we decided that we were no longer compatible.) 

In thinking on it further, it is possible.  I have met very few people that enjoy kissing as much as I do, that can do it for hours, literally loosing time and need chap stick the next day.  Excessive?  Not to me.  I have done just that, just kissing, touching but not going any further and quite literally 4 hours passed and it seemed like minuets rather than hours.  I find a good kisser, it’s hard to let him get away because, well… they seem to be few and far between in my experience.

What makes a good kiss for me probably differs from others as I can be satisfied with just kisses if they are done right.  I have no problem initiating kissing someone if I think they might like a kiss.  Take for instance, talking to a potential person to spend a great many hours with, someone I am comfortable with I like to test the waters.  

When our eyes meet, and the signal for “A kiss would be nice” such as the obvious lingering look at my mouth, (I like a smile accompanied by the look), then either they can start the kiss or I will.  Little movements with lips at first, testing the waters as I said.  I have an obsession with bottom lips, sucking on them gently into my mouth, moving my tongue around on them, waiting to see if another tongue joins mine or not.  To me, that is the “go ahead” I want before I deepen the kiss.  

Sometimes it takes a few moments to get a good rhythm, but once the exploring each other’s mouths start, I like to settle in for some real kissing.  It is a mixture of slow passionate kisses to faster, breathing harder kisses because hands are also exploring.  Nipples are being pinched; tongues are being sucked on, lips smoothly moving as each new sensation is felt.  It is fun to do this with clothing on, at least I think so.  

Mouths are one of my favorite things, always the first thing I have always noticed about someone.  If you add sucking on necks, or move to nipples… both partners nipples because if the partner is a man, he can also enjoy little sucks, bites and kisses on his nipples, well it’s a recipe for an explosion.  

Since I do write a lot about kissing, I would like to hear others thoughts on what they think the perfect kisses are.  Is it the peck on the cheek or lips, or perhaps, the faster the better?  Slower the better?  Tongue vs. No tongue? Get on with it why don’t you and kiss me quick so we can get down to the real fun?  Are kisses important to you?

Saturday, October 8, 2011


Well here I am, less time has passed since my last blog posting but still it’s been a few days.  I hope that everyone is doing well.  

I have had the sad duty of watching people break from the first moment the carpet has been ripped away from their feet to land them on their bums in a hard painful crash.  It’s never fun to watch someone break, at least for me.  I know some people get a sick pleasure out of watching others in crippling misery but for me, it affects me on many levels.  

This last month, I watched my sister who has been married for 18 years suddenly tell her husband that she no longer loves him and she was leaving him.  Everyone was shocked especially the husband who had absolutely no clue there was a problem in the first place.  I watched this man, my brother for all intents and purposes break and beg his wife for a second chance.  I watched her turn him down flat and walk away, not caring if the consequences meant that she wouldn’t see her son as much but she felt that she had to do it for whatever reason plagued her.  It wasn’t for me to understand but this kind of thing drives me insane.  

My family is a very strong, albeit strange family.  We have family dinners every Sunday because we are so close.  If we miss a weekend my nieces and nephews struggle to the next week.  Yep, we are not the typical family that only gets together on holidays but we also get together whenever we can.  It is important to us.

Now I got to watch my daughter who is 29 years old get the shock of her life and shatter bit by bit when her life partner told her that she was in love with another woman after 8 years of marriage.  No one expected this at all, least of all my daughter or this other woman’s husband of 10 years.  They totally seemed like the perfect couple, never fighting, and being so full of love for one another.  It rocked my family to the core and as a parent, breaks my heart to see my daughter go through this type of horrible pain.  She is a strong woman and will get through it but anyone that has had a break up knows it won’t be an easy road.  

Now I have seen the grief process impact several of my family members on many levels as I am sure anyone can guess if they guess how close my family is.  I have seen the pain so intense that tears are not possible to be kept at bay as I see the heartbreak overwhelm the one affected at that particular moment.  The pain radiates from the person experiencing it to those around them, making it possible to see the devastation in progress, how each person there deals with it in their own way.  

The pain is a living thing, it creeps out with tentacles to penetrate a person and how strong that person is has the distinct effect on how far they will reach in, and how much damage they will do to the person it is invading at that moment.  It is hard to watch, even harder to share in the experience but I have learned from it.  I have learned from how I react to the confusion, the utter unbelief of the situation but more then anything, I have learned from how others deal with it.
I think as a writer, regardless of the genre they write it, any situation being it painful or happy is an opportunity to observe and understand how people work.  It is seeing past the given situation to the core, being able to internalize it and feel it I think that helps me in how to better write.  

This said it has been a tough year for me.  I have let my writing take a back burner in my life because I have been overwhelmed with life but I am now excited to look at my stories that I have started.  I am back to the “Onward and Upward!” thoughts.  I am ready to get busy.  I plan to take what I have experienced this last year and take advantage of it, writing for the pure pleasure of it and see where it takes me.  

I hope that others that might be experiencing life’s challenges take a moment to stop, look around and learn from what is going on in their lives.  Take advantage of the experiences and take the good from the bad.  Find that silver lining and don’t let the difficult things you see win.  Most important?  Find someone to smile at, say something positive too, and just listen to someone.  There are so many broken people these days that you never know when that smile, or kind word will make someone’s day, even in a small way :O)

Happy Reading!

Sunday, October 2, 2011

What Really Matters

It’s been a while since I have had time to post on my blog.  I hope that you all had a nice summer!  Mine has been especially busy.  I have been helping a friend recover from an operation to remove two toes caused by diabetes.  Such a terrible disease.  He is doing well now, on the road to recovery and we are hoping he will be walking soon!  

I have also had a lot of life changes, such as my job slowing down to nearly stopping completely, family challenges, the whole nine yards.  I have done a lot of soul searching the last few months and I have come to realize what really matters in my life.  

People really are what are important.  I know a lot of people say this, and really mean it sometimes too but in helping my friend, along with a lot of challenges I find myself reflecting on not stuff, but people.  I am so happy to have such wonderful friends that help me remember who I am.

I had planned to have my next book out by now, nope, not done.  I let life’s worries take me over and I am done with that.  I am happy to say that I woke up this morning, totally sure what I am going to be doing and how to attack this crazy life I find myself in and I am finally at peace.  I am going to write, write, and write some more.  I am going to be getting several books out soon, letting the problems take care of themselves for once.  

I have several projects that I am working on and excited to get started.  I realized that I had not posted the wonderful news about my Time Well Spent the Complete Collection now being offered in paperback.  Yep, I am thrilled!  It is the “Name’s Edition” which is cool.  

I wanted to stop by though and let everyone know that I took a little break to help a friend, and now I am back to work.  I am excited to get the new books out.  Now just trying to decide which one to work on first :O) 

Have a GREAT day everyone and Happy Reading!!!